MY RAMPANT HEART
by Jessica DePue

Sometimes guttered between juniper toxins
An alien mass heady with platelets
Holding its breath
Preserved this way

Or striding a ledge between daybreak and flesh
Staking territories, exacting claims
Of hope beyond a hemorrhaged world
Precisely incised as a valentine

Sometimes over stimulated, flushed
Leaking profusely pounding towards climax
Preparing to burst all over again
Gurgling seamen, gleaning exhaustion
As I catch my breath

Lean into him, rest

It slurrs names, does shots
Like a gambler on a roll
Towards arbitrary fortune
Nose diving, radar surfing
Sprawled in a pool of gravity

Sometimes in limbo for love
I play diplomat, rationalize
Orchestrate denial no feeling no feeling
In B minor flat lining... static... stasis
It plays whims, pulls triggers, dares fate
Against my half full glass

Squeezing my core into a viable fist
A purposeful void of yesterday's wash
Soaking red sopping wet
Pumping blue lines beneath the surface
Supplying my aorta with more than enough
Drop by pulsing drop

OCTOBER 25th
by Jessica DePue

Birth day across town
His day over there- hey you
With the numbers and fire

Sushi spread beneath black sky
Spanning that plaza pool deck
Salmon roe on salty tongues

Un hatched un born
Unkempt hair grew wild
Just so
Unbound- wound up
In black satin eye masks

Scorpio likes Gemini
Assumes ardent task
Of coincidental lover
Makes him stray
Up close
Stay go
Remain

Expands his wishes
Upon rubber stars
Stretches inches
Through their scope
Consumes their space
Portals erased five years
Before
I transparently recall

Standard rules snapped
Midnight anulled new days
You deconstructed elemental absolutes
Diluted
Elusive as sloppy cursive

Silver ink lining cards
Sleekly
Defined jet streams
Deafened sonic speed
With indefinate screams

Dotted lines signify
Resolution underlined
Punctuate that date in
Resilient hues
Of markedly clear absence

You concentrated
Diffusively conducive to
Spotting comets perfectly
Memorable too

DESIRE
by Jessica DePue

Seeing him reminds me
Of everything I'd rather be doing
With him straight through me
Uncovers, slips under
Distracts me with pretense of doing them
Makes me search for a corner to take him
Drink in, take in, take him in
Every possible way between sips
(rhymes with hips)
Sedate nerves, lose discretion
Get to know him better
Without words
Save for (savor) select syllabols
To signify intent
Dis
pel
que
ry
qui
et
ly
sug
gest
po
ten
tial
ex
po
sure
Expose entirely
Urgent deliveries
Given, give in, give him
Recieve him again
And again
And again

SPECULATION
by Jessica DePue

There were children and fires
Eight kids, several fires
One after the other after the other

Breast fed, home schooled kid
Knapped by concerned relatives
Make shift homes by chance constructed

Mom went off the deep end, dad went off
Too often deepening the creases
Of love, it's obligatory reign

I chose estrangement
Formulated uncanny versions of absence
Checking in with equations, formulas
Exacting proofs that existence is real
Within this dream
Of non sequiturs

The Waco Tribune Herald informed
McLennan County he had ignited himself
My Dad mastered critical conditions

It was determined an accident
My doubts directed towards suspicion
Speculating his lack of control over anything

Visions of him striking a match
A split second dividing clean flesh
From scarred tissue and burnt screams

That permeate like ink on paper
I've stood above a sink, sickened
With sentiment

Watched words and polaroids curl
Into themselves, into vapors
I've felt the heated appetite

Of a flame consuming life
From inanimate objects, satisfying
Itself with the smug task of voidance

Leaving memory and error alone together
Like a man
Left alone with such tools

ACCIDENTALS
by Jessica DePue

There were a few hermit crabs
Molting, needing new homes
They'll adapt to anything
(Empty coke cans, the odd
Martini glass left upside down)
Just to keep covered
Too often thrown out
Dormancy resembles death
To those unfamiliar
The crab gets trashed
Along with crushed coke cans,
Broken glass
Just like the orchid
In it's final phase of bloom
It's last leaf lost
Look at that stem
Holding up solitary bracing
It's next cyclic emergence
First winter toils, threats
Externally the plant takes risks
Left to withstand time's cruel delay
With roots strongly gripping
Spring's latent signals
The orchid survives influx
Just like you awaiting
A new shell to bud anew
In your faceless presence I've adhered
To steady law of deductive reasoning I've
Cleaned house cleared space
These voids you dwell from
Seem lackluster lifeless
I've gathered hoisted this invisible
Force over my shoulder hurled
You out with the rest of it
Like a stale crab, browning orchid
Mistakenly uprooted gone for good
Their simple lives permanently displaced
Unlike such accidentals
You keep coming back

ANXIETY
by Jessica DePue

You almost feel the resistance
Trip wire catch, barely detectable
Tickling your heel

Thin as floss though much less useful
It gets in the way, succeeds in this
Masterful ploy

Was there a signal you bulls-eyed
A mark upon pavement, placed
Specifically for you to stomp

Activate, catapult every nerve
First a tremor, then tremble
Into oblivious shaking

Running is easiest, pushes
Air through vital organs
Your heart especially benefits

Never stop to question necessity
Of motion, smooth even until
Something gives

The hiccup, the fall
Backwards momentum, frightning
Relief

May not come until rest
But first breathe, hold tight
Don't break